Two types of sacrifice -Sacrificing something else and self sacrifice.
sacrifice a goat or a chicken or a maiden or a pumpkin is fine. I dont have any issues with that.
but Self sacrifice.. I hate it I hate it I hate it I hate it..
Ive been hating it since a long time... when someone forces sacrifice on others/other things its easy to oppose and revolt against but this self sacrifice is such a keeda which u cant even oppose properly.
Its their wish really isnt it? why am I bothered? Grr It bothers me no end.
Others dont seem to be bothered by self sacrifice... (oh BTW I dont mean self sacrifice = killing oneself! Please!! Just small/big sacrifices people make for others)
This is seen as a good thing, as an altruistic thing, noble thing. people are touched.
People like self sacrificing people, they worship and adore them. I remember watching a movie in which some stupid woman was doing some stupid stunts- it was a 80's kannada movie.This lady's in laws were abusing her and she, to get her sister in law married.. was selling off her kidney? :D LOL no :D haha ! no.. it was morose thing like she was having a child even tho doc told her she will die if she has one.. make that she was having a "son" :P to make it more offensive..and I found it very regressive.
My friends sunny, suma kiran were shocked that I thought it was regressive, they were like if someone does something with their own will then its not regressive. My answer was what about Sati? :D people dont argue with me when I raise the pitch to Sati level :D because then things get rabid :D
Earlier I used to feel that people behave in self sacrificing way because they are being manipulated into it, by society or by their own values or by others emotions.. or I thought people behave that way seeking adoration and approval Or I though even tho people are self sacrificing they have ulterior motives and agendas which will eventually serve them well. etc etc. All -ve :-) All these excuses made it easy for me to hate it.
but now I think thats not the case.. people do genuinely self sacrifice..
Is it an instinct or something? especially in mothers.. I mean it must have started off in mothers in mammals and then gene must have spread to others.. the altruistic gene.. Whatever, I still hate.
Is it because I am so self focused? I believe everyone should be. everyone should take care of themselves.. when someone does not, it upsets me. I somehow assume these people are expecting others to take care of them and that is dependence and that is wrong. but that also is my wrong assumption, some people just forget
about themselves and keep on slaving for others, especially women and especially for their children.
I also feel sacrifices always leave a bad after taste and build resentment in people. This is the first good valid reason from my side. I have seen this in many people. Tho not about their children, Sacrifices done towards in laws, even parents, siblings leave behind resentment.
I think I m ok with one off sacrifices but sustained life long ones.. thats what I dont like. Sacrifice out of love is no longer a sacrifice? ??
marry a girl I dont like because parents like it
wont do MBA because I need money to get my sister married
will not get married because my parents died and I will look after my siblings and If I get married my husband may not allow for this..
Will have a child even if it will casue me to die( this Ive seen only in movies BTW :-p) for some sick reasons and so on. Are all these people suffering from Hero Syndrome??
I feel in all such self sacrifice cases there is a win-win solution somewhere if people look for it, if people are just brave enough to find it? may be thats why I hate so much?
On the other hand, impromptu sacrifices like people jumping in to water to save someone but dieing.. trying to pull a girl out of train tracks and loosing leg.. I dont seem to hate.
Sacrificing people make me look bad? put pressure of me to behave that way when I donot want to??? not really... I take lot of pleasure in being opposite of that...
So, The reasons dont seem to justify the amount of dislike I have for this...
sacrifice a goat or a chicken or a maiden or a pumpkin is fine. I dont have any issues with that.
but Self sacrifice.. I hate it I hate it I hate it I hate it..
Ive been hating it since a long time... when someone forces sacrifice on others/other things its easy to oppose and revolt against but this self sacrifice is such a keeda which u cant even oppose properly.
Its their wish really isnt it? why am I bothered? Grr It bothers me no end.
Others dont seem to be bothered by self sacrifice... (oh BTW I dont mean self sacrifice = killing oneself! Please!! Just small/big sacrifices people make for others)
This is seen as a good thing, as an altruistic thing, noble thing. people are touched.
People like self sacrificing people, they worship and adore them. I remember watching a movie in which some stupid woman was doing some stupid stunts- it was a 80's kannada movie.This lady's in laws were abusing her and she, to get her sister in law married.. was selling off her kidney? :D LOL no :D haha ! no.. it was morose thing like she was having a child even tho doc told her she will die if she has one.. make that she was having a "son" :P to make it more offensive..and I found it very regressive.
My friends sunny, suma kiran were shocked that I thought it was regressive, they were like if someone does something with their own will then its not regressive. My answer was what about Sati? :D people dont argue with me when I raise the pitch to Sati level :D because then things get rabid :D
Earlier I used to feel that people behave in self sacrificing way because they are being manipulated into it, by society or by their own values or by others emotions.. or I thought people behave that way seeking adoration and approval Or I though even tho people are self sacrificing they have ulterior motives and agendas which will eventually serve them well. etc etc. All -ve :-) All these excuses made it easy for me to hate it.
but now I think thats not the case.. people do genuinely self sacrifice..
Is it an instinct or something? especially in mothers.. I mean it must have started off in mothers in mammals and then gene must have spread to others.. the altruistic gene.. Whatever, I still hate.
Is it because I am so self focused? I believe everyone should be. everyone should take care of themselves.. when someone does not, it upsets me. I somehow assume these people are expecting others to take care of them and that is dependence and that is wrong. but that also is my wrong assumption, some people just forget
about themselves and keep on slaving for others, especially women and especially for their children.
I also feel sacrifices always leave a bad after taste and build resentment in people. This is the first good valid reason from my side. I have seen this in many people. Tho not about their children, Sacrifices done towards in laws, even parents, siblings leave behind resentment.
I think I m ok with one off sacrifices but sustained life long ones.. thats what I dont like. Sacrifice out of love is no longer a sacrifice? ??
marry a girl I dont like because parents like it
wont do MBA because I need money to get my sister married
will not get married because my parents died and I will look after my siblings and If I get married my husband may not allow for this..
Will have a child even if it will casue me to die( this Ive seen only in movies BTW :-p) for some sick reasons and so on. Are all these people suffering from Hero Syndrome??
I feel in all such self sacrifice cases there is a win-win solution somewhere if people look for it, if people are just brave enough to find it? may be thats why I hate so much?
On the other hand, impromptu sacrifices like people jumping in to water to save someone but dieing.. trying to pull a girl out of train tracks and loosing leg.. I dont seem to hate.
Sacrificing people make me look bad? put pressure of me to behave that way when I donot want to??? not really... I take lot of pleasure in being opposite of that...
So, The reasons dont seem to justify the amount of dislike I have for this...
No comments:
Post a Comment