Life is like a spider web

Life is like being stuck in a spider web, unfortunately the web is created by our own selves, Each strand in the web is our conditionings, its how much we value and give importance to things which probably dont really matter. We are stuck and struggling - all unnecessarily.  

One set of strands I noticed was  how much of a fuck we give to other peoples opinion

Me stuck in all the fucks I give :D 

Even people like me - I think of myself as someone who does not give a fuck about other peoples opinion. Sure! I do do things when other people don't approve but it still bothers me - I get angry about other peoples opinion. I do care but not enough to not do things! 

This is the truth about all rebels. Those who don't genuinely care are not rebelling. They are just going about doing their shit, quietly .

If you feel embarrassed, If you feel guilty, If you feel shy, if you feel proud, if you feel happy when people compliment, all this time you are giving fucks. It is very subtle and it is hard-wired as a social animal to be people pleaser.

Genuine acceptance is rare - There are very rarely spaces where u give up performing for others and just be ourselves, Where we allow others to be and ourselves to be. Ecstatic dance was one such space - Truly liberating and such a kind gesture. 

Ps: Can you tell that I read Subtle Art of not giving a fuck! Lol! Full confession - I gave up half way tho

More Cob webs 

My father, He was arguing about how computer science is the best career. May be it was 25 years ago, now there are more opportunities, I Say. He asked if you take an average How many computer engineers succeed vs any other profession! 

This stuck me! AVERAGE! AVERAGE! AVERAGE!

 He believed a girl could do Computer Engineering when whole society believed girls were only fit for making round rotis!  Like the father in Dangal!! I m so grateful for that !

but This! This is somewhat like father in Gully boy! LOL! 

I m realising How strong a influence by dad has had on my thinking - how much I myself am stuck in average

He strongly believes in being safe and aiming for being average not in aiming high - me too! 

He asked on an average how many people make it if they are not computer engineers? - Do I dare be anything else? Do I dare imagine myself being anything beyond average? Do I dare imagine myself heading a corporation or making a difference to lives of millions or writing a white paper even? 

Cob Webs wrap our perception,  cob webs limit our dreams. The web does not bind us, we are the spider after all but we dont know that :D We are stuck in our own web!